In the Middle

When I was in high school, I once told my closest friends that I was going to find new friends.  Not because they were mean or bad friends, but because I was tired of being around people so much prettier.  They weren’t just pretty- they were talented and intelligent and caring.  I was all those things on a much less scale- not ugly, not dumb, not without talent, but being in the middle bothered me.   I was {mostly} joking about finding new friends, but the feelings remained.

As an adult, I don’t usually consider dropping friends over their awesomeness, but I do still struggle with the feeling of never quite measuring up.  I feel like I’m really good at a lot of things, but great at none, and spend way too much time being discouraged by the people around me instead of encouraged.  Instead of focusing on what I’m doing, I judge my success on those around me and how they’re doing- and I just keep falling into the middle.

That warped way of thinking was stronger than ever the past few weeks.  I’m

part of a group of terribly talented people, all working on pursuing a dream.  The dreams and talents are different, but it’s a group of people really making things happen.  But I’m so busy looking around at all they are accomplishing, and letting myself get down over what I’m not.

It took me a few weeks of wallowing in my ‘not measuring up’ to see the reality.  My path is not the same as theirs- my challenges and goals are not the same- my successes won’t be the same.  I’ve been cheering for them all along- never anything but thrilled for them- but busy being sad for me.    But I’m back.  Redefining goals and success based on what God has planned for me- not by what God has planned for those around me.

Am I the only one who needs to refocus back on God wants for me?  How are you doing at measuring success by what you’re meant to be and do, not by the world around you?  I’d love to hear.

I’m not in the middle of anything but my own story.

In the Middle of My Story

In the Middle of My Story

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Hey! I'm always working on something or another to help others with their goals. I try to pass along what I learn, and maybe we can all succeed together in whatever we're working towards. I also share from my crazy life, so get ready for some interesting tales.

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