We had a conversation recently at our house that Austin would have argued with me on. I guess I just found the one perk of your brother being missing… he can’t win the argument he isn’t there for! It was one of those silly conversations that we would have laughed about.
Ben is a handful- a handsome, sweet, independent, smart, huggable, handful. He walked early, and has been in fast forward motion ever since. He wants to do everything himself, and when he doesn’t get his way, he makes it very clear that he’s not happy. And then he hugs you. And you forget what a terror he just was. Almost.
I made the comment that Austin would really enjoy Ben, and would laugh at me trying to successfully parent this crazy little one. Drew asked me why, and I told him that his Uncle Austin was just like Ben, and would really appreciate seeing me tortured so! I jokingly told Drew that “Uncle Austin was the bad one and I was the good one.” Drew immediately wanted to know which one he was, and I quickly answered “the good one.”
The truth is, I followed the less rocky path, the clearer path, the one that most would choose for their child. (Note- trust me when I say that I am NOT claiming to have been or be an angel!) Drew chooses those same paths. He is more cautious, slower to act and quicker to think. (Note- he is also no angel!) Drew and I play it safe.
Austin chose to do what was fun and was quicker to decide what that was. He was sweet and never mean that I can honestly remember. His path was different than mine, more rocky and curvy, and all his own. I think it may have been harder, but it was his. Decisions weren’t based on fear but on pursuing what he wanted. What he wanted wasn’t always what we wanted for him, but it was never bad, never hurtful to others. It was the right path for him.
Ben’s path is still so unclear…. but it’s already pretty clear that it’s not a safe and easy one, but one we’ll try his whole life to protect him on, and one I believe he’ll enjoy and be a joy to others on. Just like his Uncle Austin.